I think I'll go to Boston. I think I'll start a new life...

Pretty much all my life I've wanted to be an architect. I have a strange connection with buildings. My favorite thing in the whole world (aside from the tired laugh, of course) is to look at restored buildings. I love going on house tours and it drives me crazy when they have part of the house, like a staircase, roped off. What are they hiding up there? Anyway, I'm thinking about it again. Here I am with two degrees that I don't really want to use, why not go for another. It sounds kind of irresponsible to me, but it keeps coming up. The last time I considered it seriously when I graduated from BYU. I didn't do it then because the thought of 5 more years of school didn't appeal to me at all. Here I am, 5 years later thinking about it again. Ironically, I could have been done by now.

I'm probably being irrational. It doesn't seem logical that I could hate my job that much. After all, I get excellent vacations. But I do hate it that much. The highs are really high but very infrequent. Most days I wonder if I've done any good at all. Let's be honest, most days I consider purchasing a tranquilzer gun. And I rarely look forward to a Monday without dread. That's no way to live. I can see myself talking myself down off the ledge and coming back again next year, but I can't imagine that it would be good. I think I've aged 15 years in the last 3.

On the other hand, I'm not a great student. I don't like it very much. (I know, it's soooooooooooo ironic that I'm a teacher.) But maybe I've just been studying the wrong things. I'm a little scared of going into debt. I have a master's degree and I've never had student debt. THat's pretty lucky. Do I want to mess with that? Do you like how I'm listing my pros and cons for the world to see? Here's another important question: is Boston colder than NYC? That could be a deal breaker. Any words of wisdom would be appreciated.

Today one of my students told me I was his favorite teacher. Then he told me he wished I taught something other than math. Why do people hate math? Math is our friend. I'm kind of a nerd, but I'm learning to accept it. I wish other people would too.