Will I ever be normal again?

So, I have reached the point in the point in the semester where I feel like my mind will never be my own again. Thoughts and worries of my students consume me, and they won't leave until the students are no longer mine to worry about. It's what makes summer vacation truly a vacation.

I finally got a little clarification on the previously posted vocabulary word, cosignin'. We were using it like crazy this afternoon. "Yo, why you cosignin'?" they repeatedly yell at one another until it reaches the point where I have to yell at them to disengage. It basically means mind your own business, and no matter how incensed they are by everyone cosignin' on everyone else, they continue to cosign. Next year one of my rules will be "Mind your own business." It turns out that "Take responsibility for yourself and your own actions" is a little too vague for them.

They still get pretty annoyed when I "call out their government." Admittedly I still do it mostly because I think their reactions are funny.

One of my past students came to talk to me today. It just fills my heart with joy. It's the weirdest thing. He dropped in to tell me he missed my class. I find it interesting that all my students, no matter how they complained about me as a teacher, want me again when they see the alternatives. A couple of girls who really made my life difficult last year came to me this year and asked me to give them special permission to get them transferred into my class. They begged to be transferred out last year. I reminded them of that and suggested that the problem may not be with the teacher. They didn't ask again.

Two years ago I had a student named Daniel. He was a charmer and a pain in my neck. You went to school with that kind of kid. Maybe some of you were that kind of kid. Completely exasperating and too likable to dislike. Anyway, at the end of the year we reached a breaking point, he became completely disrespectful and unmanageable. The next year I learned that he had moved down south to live with some relatives and go to school in Georgia. His brother was still at our school so I heard occasional updates. He was back the second part of the year and I admit that he was easier to get along with when I didn't have to teach him.

I saw him only a few times this year. The last time was a few weeks ago. It was during my free period and he poked his head in my door. I greeted him happily and he came in to talk. He is a changed person. Now a junior in high school he sees how important education is. He's a lucky one. He and his brother got accepted to a private school in New Jersey. they got out of the system and they're thriving. He was telling me that he's between grades because he fell behind in NYC public schools, but he was working hard to catch up before his senior year. He's planning on college. I was so proud of him. He's grown up and has direction now. That's why I'm still here. It's not that I had anything to do with his transformation, because I didn't. But I got to see it. It's a pretty amazing thing to watch someone change for the better. That's why I stay.